What to Expect in Your First EMDR Session
Deciding to start therapy takes courage, and not knowing what will happen in the room can make it harder. Here is an honest walk-through of how EMDR therapy usually unfolds, so there are fewer surprises and more room to focus on you.
Your first session is a conversation
EMDR is an approach to therapy, and when you begin any therapy the main goal will be to understand what is happening and what you want to get out of the process. The therapist will ask you lots of questions, and you will have a chance to ask your therapist questions too. In the first session the focus is usually more about what is happening currently and not a deep dive into your past.
Preparation comes before processing
Before working directly with difficult memories, your therapist will help you build resources: ways to calm and steady yourself, both in session and in daily life. This might include breathing and grounding skills, imagining a calm place, or strengthening positive experiences. For some people this phase is short. For others it is a longer and genuinely valuable part of the work. This phase assures you have tools to manage both in session and between your EMDR sessions.
Another part of preparation is making a treatment plan and determining which memories may need to be reprocessed.
What reprocessing is like
Once you and your therapist determine which memory to use as a target, they will guide you to help your brain access that memory. These questions are about what is happening NOW when you bring up that memory, and not about remembering the past. That is because EMDR helps you to release whatever is still here from that previous experience.
After the series of questions, the therapist will guide you to do the bilateral stimulation and notice what happens. In this phase, it is best to be open and curious about what is actually happening now, and not worried about what should be happening. After a few moments of bilateral stimulation the therapist will stop and ask you for feedback on what you are noticing. There is no right or wrong way for you to do EMDR. Your therapist will check in briefly between sets, and your job is simply to notice whatever comes up, without forcing anything.
People are often surprised by how active their own mind is in this process. Thoughts connect, emotions rise and settle, and the memory gradually loses its grip. You are awake, aware, and in control the whole time, and you can pause whenever you need to.
After a session
Processing can continue for a day or two after a session. Some people feel tired, notice vivid dreams, or find new memories and insights surfacing. That is a normal sign that your brain is doing its work. Your therapist will give you simple ways to care for yourself between sessions, and anything that comes up becomes useful material for the next one.
The pace is yours
There is no prescribed number of sessions for EMDR, it can be different for everyone. EMDR is an eight-phase approach to therapy but not eight steps. You and your therapist will determine a flow that works for you.
Ready to talk with someone?
Every therapist listed on EMDRtherapists.com has completed EMDR Basic Training from an EMDRIA-Approved training provider.
This article is for general education. It is not therapy, diagnosis, or a substitute for care from a licensed professional.